Why a really little question can make a really big difference

As I write this it’s 9:34 am, Saturday morning of a May Bank Holiday weekend with the sun shining down from a beautiful pale blue sky scattered with light cloud.  The temperature in the office reads 26.4 degrees C. And now for the shipping forecast!

After a hectic week I was out working with a client yesterday morning, returned home and after a quick late lunch and catch up with Pam made some calls and did what was needed to follow them up until 6:30 pm. After dinner I got changed into my scruffs and headed out to do what was needed in the garden. Grass cut, ivy trimmed and weeding completed I came in at 9:00 pm, had a shower then went back into the office to add my little bit to the Newsletter that Pam had been working on all Friday afternoon. Office door closed it was time to pour a drink and watch a couple of bits of TV we had recorded before bed.

That short summary is typical these days of my busy life which seems to be getting busier by the week. It’s also very typical of lots of other people I talk with. Life can feel like a relentless and never ending conveyer belt of all the many things that need to be done. On top of everything else you somehow also need to do your best to fit in a little rest and relaxation along the way.

So my long Bank Holiday weekend will be spent working my way through a list of work tasks, things that need to be done in the house, some family time and a little bit of relaxation and ‘me time’. I am happy and upbeat about it all and that’s nothing to do with the feel good factor created naturally by the sunshine outside, instead my mood has got everything to do with what’s going on inside – me!
Years ago having absolutely nothing to do except relax and enjoy myself would have been the only way that I would have been in a good mood at the start of a long sunny Bank Holiday weekend. Then, I’d probably still get in a strop about something anyway, so I’d end up in a bad mood regardless. Please!  But now I understand why I did that, it wasn’t a random set of behaviours; it was pre-programmed in and was an inevitable result of my poor thinking habits.

Busy days with loads to do and easy days with nothing planned are both at the mercy of our mood minute to minute. What has really helped me cope well when life seems relentless is taking charge of how I choose to feel about the inevitable list of things ‘To Do’. Likewise, what enables me to relax and enjoy - and much more importantly to appreciate – my down time is taking charge of how I choose to feel about it.

For me the affirmation which is in the form of a question: “Just how good a day am I having today?” is my pre-programmed default setting. It really works – for me.
The key is to find a style of affirmation, mantra or positive statement (call them what you like, it doesn’t matter) that works for you.

You might prefer, as I often do, the Why style of affirmation to help you choose your mood. This uses a question starting with the word Why to give your day a really positive and powerful frame of reference to operate within. For instance, saying to yourself “Why am I having such a great day today?” hands over to your unconscious mind the instructions for it to operate on all day. Just as asking yourself “Why is everything going so wrong today?” will give your unconscious mind new instructions to work on.

You can download our ‘Essential Guide to Positive Mental Attitude’ through the web site at www.totemtrainingltd.co.uk for more information about affirmations and how to use them.
Anyway, this task is about to be crossed off the list and I’ll get on with the next one - happy to do so because that’s what I choose to feel like. By the way, with impeccable timing, the sun’s just gone in!!

“Why am I having such a brilliant day today?”